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Cheney Returns Acting President Powers to Bush

by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace · 43 Comments · · Print This Story Print This Story

(2007-07-22) — Following several hours as “acting president” of the U.S., Dick Cheney voluntarily relinquished the title back to George Bush yesterday when the latter emerged from sedation after a colonoscopy.

Administration spokesman Tony Snow said the White House functioned normally during Mr. Bush’s procedure, and that having the vice president officially at the helm may have even increased executive branch efficiency by “cutting out the middle man.”

The vice president said he was glad to get back to his regular job of “running the country” and away from the added stress of both “giving orders to, and taking orders from, myself.”

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43 responses so far ↓

  • 1 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 22, 2007 at 8:56 am

    God Bless America

  • 2 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 22, 2007 at 8:59 am

    Actually, yesterday I did momentarily envision Cheney with his feet up on the president’s desk-I mean, I woulda.

  • 3 conserve-a-tips // Jul 22, 2007 at 9:07 am

    OK, I’ll try posting again seeing as the Twilight Zone has eaten my post:

    Good morning on this beautiful Lord’s Day.

    I guess this means that we have a “Shadow Government”? ~ Cheney walks in George’s shadow?

    I’ll answer that myself. “Not in the eyes of liberals.” (theme from Twilight Zone in the background)

  • 4 onlineanalyst // Jul 22, 2007 at 9:45 am

    Thank goodness that this smooth transition took place before Nanny Pulloutsi signaled a palace coup.

  • 5 University Update - White House - Cheney Returns Acting President Powers to Bush // Jul 22, 2007 at 10:53 am

    [...] Supreme Court Link to Article white house Cheney Returns Acting President Powers to Bush » Posted at ScrappleFace on Sunday, July 22, 2007 (2007-07-22) — Following several hours as “acting president” of the U.S., Dick Cheney voluntarily relinquished the title back to George Bush yesterday when the latter emerged from sedation after a colonoscopy. Administration spokesman Tony Snow said the White House View Entire Article » [...]

  • 6 EXT // Jul 22, 2007 at 11:21 am

    Bush wanted to see the leadership of congress.

    That’s why he asked for the scope-cam video of the colonoscopy to be played back on a big-screen TV as soon as he got home.

  • 7 conserve-a-tips // Jul 22, 2007 at 12:10 pm

    EXT: eeeuuuuwwww!!

  • 8 camojack // Jul 22, 2007 at 12:22 pm

    Administration spokesman Tony Snow said the White House functioned normally during Mr. Bush’s procedure, and that having the vice president officially at the helm may have even increased executive branch efficiency by “cutting out the middle man.”

    Heh. Yeah, that’s what a lot of people think, anyway…

  • 9 Beerme // Jul 22, 2007 at 1:06 pm

    Good to see a new post!
    Good afternoon, everybody!

  • 10 SnakeDoctor // Jul 22, 2007 at 2:50 pm

    Anybody want to hazard a guess that if something had happened to Cheney while he was acting president and Nan Pelosi had replaced him as acting president, that the returning of the reins of power to Bush would have been just a teensy little bit more complicated?

    Nah… just my conspiritorial side speaking.


    1. The government blew up the towers.
    2. We never “actually” landed on the moon.
    3. The CIA killed JFK, RFK, and MLK Jr.
    4. There are alien bodies at Area 51 and UFO’s are real.

  • 11 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 22, 2007 at 3:31 pm

    5. Harry actually believes the things he says and he is sane.

  • 12 Darthmeister // Jul 22, 2007 at 4:43 pm

    Whaaaaat? You mean Cheney was president and he didn’t pardon Scooter Libby, drop nuclear bombs on Syria, Iran and North Korea and round up all the seditious libs and put them in rendition camps in Uzbekistan? Man, he must be going soft.

  • 13 Just the Facts, Ma&# // Jul 22, 2007 at 5:52 pm

    Did "W" get a note from the Dr. telling the Dumbocraps that his head really isn't up there?

  • 14 conserve-a-tips // Jul 22, 2007 at 6:48 pm

    SnakeDoctor re #10: Yeah, I read about those too and decided that they must be true since they were in the Enquirer. :-)

  • 15 DrivebyMeteor // Jul 22, 2007 at 7:06 pm

    Now, when the Blame Bush crowd starts crowing again, cursing W for the world’s woes, we can always say, “This stuff wouldn’t be happening if President Cheney was still in office!”

  • 16 The Great Santini // Jul 22, 2007 at 7:24 pm

    Does this mean that while Cheney was # 1, SanFranNan was # 2? Now there’s a sobering thought. Oh, well, she’s always looked like # 2 to me.

    The republic has weathered the storm. Bush43 is back in the saddle again; all his troubles are behind him now.

  • 17 SnakeDoctor // Jul 22, 2007 at 7:31 pm

    Driveby, that’s a very satirical observation. What do you think this is, a satire site?????

    6. The Bilderburgers are ruling the world. You can look it up.
    7. When the Bilderburgers are on vacation, the Trilateral Commission takes over ruling the world.
    8. It’s all a Masonic conspiracy.
    9. It’s all a Knights Templar conspiracy.

    IT’S ALL TRUE!!! REALLY!!!!! Well, maybe…..

  • 18 Darthmeister // Jul 22, 2007 at 10:14 pm

    From Michael Totten vis a vis MudvilleGazette:

    After having spent several days Baghdad’s Green Zone and Red Zone, I still haven’t heard or seen any explosions. It’s a peculiar war. It is almost a not-war. Last July’s war in Northern Israel and Southern Lebanon was hundreds of times more violent and terrifying than this one. Explosions on both sides of the Lebanese-Israeli border were constant when I was there.

    You’d think explosions and gunfire define Iraq if you look at this country from far away on the news. They do not. The media is a total distortion machine.

  • 19 Darthmeister // Jul 22, 2007 at 10:19 pm

    SnakeDoctor, don’t forget the Illuminati’s part.

    And in the final analysis it’s those darn Jooooooooish bankers who are the real financiers behind the multi-national corporations OUT TO RULE THE WORLD … MUWHA … MUWHA … MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  • 20 RedPepper // Jul 23, 2007 at 3:04 am

    It’s good to see that Scott has (temporarily, at least) returned to his regular job here at Scrappleface!

    Scott, hope that things at Victory Valley Camp are going swimmingly! Have fun!

  • 21 Fred Sinclair // Jul 23, 2007 at 7:23 am

    I give thanks to God always for giving us Scott and constantly ask Him to continue blessing Scott and his dual ministry, here and at Victory Valley Camp, and all of my Scrappler brothers and sisters.

    It’s easy to pray that way, fot those you love and who love you. Right now and soon to be much more often, I pray for Harry, Nancy, Carl, Barbara and all those so taken in (as Eve was), by satan and his minions. They don’t need a church, not even my church - most of them already have a church. They all are all in dire need of a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. And any good Bible believing, Bible preaching church will do fine.

    I also pray for President Bush and those God has put in their positions “over us.” The president is going to need our prayers over the next eighteen months as he continues to try and lead this country through the maze of lliberal emnity. And our troops who serve this country around the world, whether it’s a Personnel Clerk operating a computer at Fairchild AFB, a Drill Instructor at a Basic Training post (Boot Camp - for those in Rio Linda) or a cook preparing meals in Iraq. Our Military deserves our prayers and support.

    I was hoping that President Cheney would indeed pardon those three Border Patrol Agents - guess it wasn’t meant to be.

    We survived (as a Nation) four years of Jimmy Who? And eight years of the Clinton team. So with all of our warts and scars we continue to live in the greatest nation on earth.

    God bless America!

    Heirborn Ranger

  • 22 Fred Sinclair // Jul 23, 2007 at 8:35 am

    I see DRUDGE is reporting an effort to stop the wave of hate directed towrd Latinos - charges talk radio with killing the immigration bill.

    Gee didn’t they think of rounding up and deporting ALL of the over twelve million illegal aliens as a primary way of hushing talk radio on the subject?

    Heirborn Ranger

    btw - I pray for the illegal aliens too. I pray that with our help they can all find their way safely back to their country of origin, sooner than later. - fs

  • 23 JamesonLewis3rd // Jul 23, 2007 at 9:14 am

    It looks like Dennis Miller (prepare to laugh) might dislike Harry almost as much as I do.

  • 24 Maggie // Jul 23, 2007 at 11:53 am


    JFK is DEAD!!!!!?????

  • 25 GnuCarSmell // Jul 23, 2007 at 11:59 am

    Does this mean Lynne Cheney was acting First Lady?

  • 26 Darthmeister // Jul 23, 2007 at 12:04 pm

    … and Dick Cheney’s lesbian daughter* Mary was acting First Daugher!

    *white liberals are always bringing this point up in hopes of “embarassing” Dick Cheney which says a lot about how liberals really feel about homosexuals … that is, appropriate for use as political cannon fodder like black Americans.

  • 27 RedPepper // Jul 23, 2007 at 12:04 pm

    This is the year 5767 in the Jewish calendar. From sunset tonight (the twenty-third of July 2007) until nightfall on July 24 is Tisha B’Av, a day of mourning to commemorate the many tragedies that have befallen the Jewish people (many of which occurred on the ninth day of the month of Av).

    Tisha B’Av primarily commemorates the destruction of the first and second Temples, both of which were destroyed on the ninth of Av (the first by the Babylonians in 586 B.C.E. ; the second by the Romans in 70 C.E.).

    A prayer for Israel on the occasion of the Fast of Tisha B’Av :

    By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Zion.
    We hanged our harps upon the willows in the midst thereof.
    For there they that carried us away captive required of us a song; and they that wasted us required of us mirth, saying, sing us one of the songs of Zion.

    How shall we sing the LORD’s song in a strange land ?
    If I forget thee, O Jerusalem, let my right hand forget her cunning.
    If I do not remember thee, let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth ; if I prefer not Jerusalem above my chief joy.

    ( Psalm 137: 1-6 )

  • 28 Fred Sinclair // Jul 23, 2007 at 12:27 pm

    When I was stationed at Wheelus Air Base in Libya it was quite noticable that approaching 100% almost all Libyan Muslims were very heavy cigarette smokers.

    With American prisons, jails and hospitals all “smoke free”. I wonder if the terrorist wannabees at Club Gitmo are being “tortured” bybeing forced to live in a totally smoke free environment? Or like their religious needs (Free Korans, Free Prayer Rugs - five free periods for prayer time each day) Do they get to smoke free cigarettes, while those guarding them are forbidden to smoke?

    Heirborn Ranger

  • 29 SnakeDoctor // Jul 23, 2007 at 12:48 pm

    Maggie, re #24

    Sorry to have to be the one to break it to you, but yes, JFK is dead!!!! That would be John F. Kennedy, not John F’ing Kerry. I realize it’s easy to confuse the two as both are/were young, athletic, charismatic, tax cutting, America First war heroes, and Democrat Senators from Massachusetts.

    Well Kerry is a “Democrat” “Senator from Massachusetts” so I guess two out of seven isn’t too bad, at least according to liberal math.

  • 30 Shelly // Jul 23, 2007 at 1:32 pm

    I thought Karl Rove was running everything?

  • 31 woodnwheel // Jul 23, 2007 at 1:40 pm

    Once again I’m late to the party. Oh well…

    Another job well done, Scott!

  • 32 EXT // Jul 23, 2007 at 2:23 pm

    Amazing First!

    Democrap congressional leaders this morning issued a blistering statement denouncing the beheading of five of their number.

    It was the first time in recent memory that Democraps have even reacted to outrages against American citizens.

    White House spokesman Tony Snow responded that the Democraps upset had no basis in fact. Those, he said, were polyps, not Democraps. He admitted that first results were ambiguous but lab tests revealed the growth removed from The President’s colon were benign, so could not possibly have been Democraps.

  • 33 Shelly // Jul 23, 2007 at 3:21 pm

    EXT, you know the word benign was a huge dissapointment to those on the left, those tolerant “let’s all get along” types. They’ll probably accuse the President’s colon of not being bi-partisan enough.

  • 34 EXT // Jul 23, 2007 at 4:42 pm

    Bless you, Shelly!

    It’s even worse than you imagined. Democraps also have to deal with the knowledge that God turned a deaf ear to their prayers in that all-night camp meeting.

    But there is a bright side:

    As The President’s removed polyps continue to dry one is taking on an amazing resemblance to Senator Harry Reid. Bidding from various oddity and freak-show museums is spirited. The Bush family has generously offered to donate the entire proceeds of Reid-polyp auction toward deficit reduction.

    One chain of museums has sent an urgent e-mail to their franchisees telling them not to bid individually. There will be one gigantic corporate bid and, if successful, the Reid-polyp will be put on the road, spending 30-days in each museum.

    Speculators are watching the other polyps in hopes that, as they continue to dry, one or more might resemble other Democrap visages. Vegas oddsmakers are giving the edge, at this writing, to the possibility that there’ll be only one and it’ll look somewhat like Eleanor Roosevelt. Heck, said one high-roller, “you can’t deny that almost any polyp will look at least a little like her.”

    Also in the news:

    Clintonista publicists are hotly denying rumors that Hillary was strip-searched before boarding a flight over the weekend. It was alleged that an agent found it impossible to believe that a pants suit that baggy was concealing nothing more than cellulite. The agent is said to have personally apologized after being proven wrong.

  • 35 onlineanalyst // Jul 23, 2007 at 6:44 pm

    EXT: No doubt Madame Hillary urges our bugging out from Iraq and the ME, for she worries about having to haul her hams to the area in the future lest they inflame a further sense of injury in the easily offended Muslim mindset.

  • 36 nomoregore // Jul 23, 2007 at 9:25 pm

    You mean…..(dark organ music)…..Cheney was actually in charge? How many wars did he start? How many millions of innocents did he kill?
    Did no-one consult with Keith Olbermann beforehand?

  • 37 RedPepper // Jul 24, 2007 at 1:00 am

    Hey, c-a-t. Are you around? I just tried sending an email to you but got an error back. Could you maybe send me one? I am still at my old (laughsat… etc.) address. Thanx, & talk 2 u soon …

  • 38 Gotcha // Jul 24, 2007 at 12:46 pm

    EEEEWWWWWW!! Hope there were Haz-mat suits available….and talk about "double-gloving"!!

  • 39 Darthmeister // Jul 24, 2007 at 12:32 pm

    I didn’t know radical leftists were benign … even if they are little more than metaphorical polyps. Too bad P.T. Barnum isn’t around to take advantage of this emerging freak show.

  • 40 Darthmeister // Jul 24, 2007 at 12:35 pm


    Hillary was strip-searched? Hope the security agent had a couple of barf bags handy.

  • 41 Just Ranting // Jul 24, 2007 at 4:08 pm

    Hillary…strip searched…there’s a mental image only a Bulimic could want. Yeeesh!!!

  • 42 DrivebyMeteor // Jul 24, 2007 at 7:14 pm

    OMG! Are you kidding!? Strip-search the Wicked Witch of the North-East?

    Gag me with a broom . . .

  • 43 Darthmeister // Jul 25, 2007 at 8:40 am

    Ward “Little Eichmanns” Churchill gets canned.

    Couldn’t have happened to a nicer liar and plagiarist.

    And here’s more on Churchill the Left-wing Charlatan.

    At least Churchill was consistent in upholding the fine tradition of left-wing lying … you have to give him his due on that!

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