(2009-01-06) — First Lady Laura Bush has reportedly inked a deal for an undisclosed sum to write a tell-all memoir recounting her White House years.
A publicist for Scribner, an imprint of Simon & Shuster, said the brochure-length hardcover book, set for release in spring of 2010, “Will fairly pulsate with titillating tales of flagrant marital fidelity, and eyewitness accounts of rampant integrity from the seemly underbelly of the Bush White House.”
The book promises to reveal Mrs. Bush’s secret affairs, including her daily struggle with compulsive graciousness, and uncontrollable dignity.
“As readers will learn,” said the unnamed publicist, “the Laura Bush you thought you knew, and the real, private Laura Bush are exactly alike. They’re identical twins. It’s a bit frightening really.”
Scribner has already begun to gear up production, expecting the book will sell countless dozens of copies.
56 responses so far ↓
1 RedPepper // Jan 6, 2009 at 10:56 am
Tales of dodging Dick Cheney’s shotgun blasts, perhaps?
2 camojack // Jan 6, 2009 at 11:05 am
Brochure length, eh?
3 gafisher // Jan 6, 2009 at 11:08 am
I’m sure Oliver Stone can turn it into a feature-length film.
4 gafisher // Jan 6, 2009 at 11:11 am
Amazingly, Laura Bush’s brochure-length memoir recounts more actual accomplishments than Barack Obama’s entire political career …
5 RedPepper // Jan 6, 2009 at 11:43 am
Folks … don’t forget to turn on your TVs so you can see Senate Majority Leader George Corley Reid standing in the Senate door this morning! History in the making! Must-see!
6 Left Coast-Right Mind // Jan 6, 2009 at 11:51 am
The First Lady’s tell-all memoir doesn’t really have to be longer than a brochure since the State Department has already leaked the rest.
7 Ms RightWing, Ink // Jan 6, 2009 at 12:08 pm
I tell ya, the tell-all is telling if ya know what I mean–I tell ya man, it is really, well you know, telling.
That is about all I can say about that book. Sort of what you see (didn’t) is what you will get.
8 Fred Sinclair // Jan 6, 2009 at 12:36 pm
“rampant integrity” – WoW that’s been strangely absent from the vocabulary of politicians across the aisle and unfortunately too many on this side too.
Until Congress passes the Enumerated Powers bill we don’t have a government. We have a poor imitation of a government. we have a sad, bad joke for a government. They spend millions of dollars to win a seat that pays a couple of hundred thousand a year. They place their right hand in the air, their left hand on a Bible and swear a solemn oath to support protect and defend the Constitution of the United States and then, once in Washington do everything, both legal and illegal to rip it to shreds.
I want to be there as they are sworn in and jump from my chair, screaming “LIAR, LIAR – PANTS ON FIRE” since Harry Truman, I don’t know of any who left Washington and returned home to private life poorer than when he got to D.C.
9 CalGirl // Jan 6, 2009 at 12:46 pm
This is a good’un.
(back to work, heh heh heh)
10 Tinman // Jan 6, 2009 at 12:56 pm
She is one classy lady.
11 Brushed Calls // Jan 6, 2009 at 1:09 pm
“…including her daily struggle with compulsive graciousness, and uncontrollable dignity.”…
…now there’s a turn of phrase that you won’t be able to use for the forseeable future!
12 Fausta’s Blog » Blog Archive » Turkey holds Iranian explosives heading to Venezuela, transition purgatory, and other news items // Jan 6, 2009 at 2:24 pm
[...] friend Scrappleface is back and in great shape! Laura Bush Inks Deal for Tell-All Memoir Brochure, Bill Clinton: CIA Pick Panetta Can Keep a [...]
13 baragirl // Jan 6, 2009 at 3:50 pm
Fred said,”I don’t know of any who left Washington and returned home to private life poorer than when he got to D.C.
Scooter Libby?
14 everthink // Jan 6, 2009 at 3:56 pm
13 days!
ET
15 Beerme // Jan 6, 2009 at 4:24 pm
Laura Bush Rocks!
16 MajorDomo // Jan 6, 2009 at 5:36 pm
HAPPY NEW YEAR SCOTT AND FELLOW SCRAPPLERS!
Seems we won’t have to wait 13 days, ET. President Obama is already playing President. Hide your wallet. He’s talking about “reinvestment”, Democrat code for re-spending
PS: Haven’t heard Democrats caterwauling about “how we gonna pay for it?” Wha’ Hoppen?
17 Fred Sinclair // Jan 6, 2009 at 6:24 pm
I got this Urgent e-mail – Action needed NOW!
SENATE BILL S. 2433 THE GLOBAL POVERTY ACT !
This bill, sponsored by none other than Sen. Barack Obama, with the backing of Joe Biden on the Foreign Relations Committee, and liberal democrats in Congress, is nothing short of a massive giveaway of American wealth around the world.
O.K. So I read it – all the horrific details. Then I got to thinking. How’s this my business or concern?
If Bill Gates wants to give away his 80 billion dollars to farmers in Brazil – it’s none of my business.
If the hold-up guy steals my wallet and wants to use the money to buy drugs – it’s none of my business.
Once the usurper was given America’s wallet, it’s his money. Call it taxes or loot – same thing.
The mugger on the street can’t hope for billions or trillions of dollars but the usurper did hope. And we gave him the combination to the vault. With threat of armed (with guns) officers coming to arrest and imprison those who don’t (or refuse to) pony up a part of their paycheck we co-operate in helping with the theft. (because we don’t want to be shot or put in prison).
The only two people who can take your money are (1) The robber with a gun and (2) The government with it’s guns.
Once you’ve handed over your wallet what happens to the money is of no consequence.. The Conservatives stayed home in droves while the Liberals voted and consequently what the usurper does with his money is at best a moot point.
So I won’t forward the e-mail nor will I donate to try and stop the SENATE BILL S. 2433. I will concentrate on doing what I can toward unseating the usurper in 2012. Putting a responsible Conservative in the office of the President who can be trusted with the combination to the vault.
But in the interim we are going to pay a great price for our folly in 2008 where we allowed the usurper (a man who has yet to prove that he is even eligible for the office) to “win” the election.
18 Fred Sinclair // Jan 6, 2009 at 6:41 pm
JUST TO TO FUNNY*****
From a “Year in Review” column by humorist Dave Barry:
…Barack Obama, in a historic triumph, becomes the nation’s first black president since the second season of 24, setting off an ecstatically joyful and boisterous all-night celebration that at times threatens to spill out of The New York Times newsroom.
19 Ms RightWing, Ink // Jan 6, 2009 at 8:00 pm
Back to the ER. Can’t win over this lung infection.
Later friends.
20 mindknumbed kid // Jan 6, 2009 at 9:44 pm
Am I missing something? Blagojavich legally appointed Burris to fill Obumbler’s vacated Senate seat,shows up for work (how many other Senators often fail to do that?) and Scarry Reid refuses to let him play in their game…he wanted one of two Caucasian women to fill the seat…as leader of the Senate he appears to be desperate to get another woman under him. And the media isn’t making a big deal about this story… I would love to see a republican try this kind of stunt, he would be vilified day and night as a racist, sexist, and criminal leader that needed to be eliminated from the Senate. Yep, this is the way the democrats run things…model citizens doing an honest job…makes me proud. Not…
21 mindknumbed kid // Jan 6, 2009 at 9:47 pm
Prayers for you Ms RW, get well soon! That is an order.
22 mindknumbed kid // Jan 6, 2009 at 10:15 pm
Perhaps one day this will make quite a tell all book, or brochure:
http://www.americasright.com/2009/01/with-supreme-court-conference-looming-q.html
23 mindknumbed kid // Jan 6, 2009 at 10:20 pm
Hello Whitesville, West Virginia! Care to chat?
24 mindknumbed kid // Jan 6, 2009 at 10:46 pm
Rats, they didn’t stick around to talk…
25 conserve-a-tip // Jan 6, 2009 at 10:49 pm
Sorry, but this book/brochure/pamplet/leaflet will never sell/be a freebie/make the best seller list because there won’t be any bad words, sex, or scandal. In other words, it will just be too clean. Now, get the DC Dems to collaborate and you’ll have a collection equal to the number of books in a set of encyclopedias that will make Hugh Hefner blush.
26 conserve-a-tip // Jan 6, 2009 at 10:50 pm
Beerme: Re the last thread: I thought about that after I posted it. It isn’t a good thing to use those words and a color in the same sentence!! The liberal police and all – you know? (I speak Caroline too)
27 Possumtrot // Jan 7, 2009 at 2:40 am
Happy New Year’s to all!
I got my mail notification, and my e-mail notification still works! Praise be to the gizmo gods who seem to rule all blogs these days!
Welcome back to the ether, Great Scott. Ye have been missed!
Sort of on-topic, I’ll bet Lady Laura has a tale or three to tell.
I can’t wait for the coronation of The New Messiah, when everything will be all right again.
I am trying to stay tuned with W.C. Fields, and give a guy and even break. However, like Fields, I more and more want a gulp of whiskey, and less and less to do with our government.
I didn’t become alarmed until I heard that armed Capitol guards would greet this Burris guy from Illinois at the front steps of the Senate.
Great. We now have minimum-wage security guards, men with guns, now conducting the governance of America. Is a third-world bannana republic far behind?
Step up and buy your Kennedy-Lincoln-Obama coins at once, kids!
28 RepublicanAttackMachine // Jan 7, 2009 at 6:28 am
Pretty amazing that Laura is MUCH more qualified to be President than the moron who will “occupy it” for the next 4 years!
That is unless we impeach him, or he is found to be an illegal President first.
Let the hearings begin!
29 Hawkeye // Jan 7, 2009 at 9:08 am
Welcome back Scott! Good stuff as usual. Best regards…
30 boberinyetagain // Jan 7, 2009 at 9:44 am
Laura was/is a class act for certain!
And George is a nice guy but that doesn’t mean i’m not glad to see hom go…very glad…how long has it been since he was “sure” that the folks in the ME could “work things out”? About a week prior to the bombing/now invasion.
If he had a clue about ANYTHING, i’d feel differently.
31 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:05 am
Boberin, I ask you very politely to look back at every single president since the UN established the state of Israel and tell me ONE that didn’t say that things could work out in the ME. Maybe we should take away Carter’s Nobel Peace Prize because he was wrong? Maybe we should say, “Whew! Clinton is out of there because he was totally delusional about the ME!!??” The WORLD is delusional about the ME, Boberin, and will remain so. There is this mistaken thought that terrorists and thugs can be reasoned with and brought into “negotiations”. Wrong. Terrorists and thugs are unreasonable beings who demand what they want, when they want it and can only be dealt with by prison or worse. The fact is, a conflict that has been recorded in the Bible thousands of years ago, is still going on and will continue to go on until God chooses to end this earth as we know it.
32 RedPepper // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:31 am
c-a-t: No, no! Say it ain’t so!
I’m still convinced that the lion will lie down with the lamb!
Remember, lamb is very tasty, particularly with mint sauce …
33 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:35 am
Boberin, and really all – I just sat down to do my daily Bible reading and about dropped my teeth. After just writing my response to Boberin about the ME conflict having gone on since Biblical times, I couldn’t believe how God affirmed my statement. I am in Ezekiel and this is from chapter 35: 5-15:
“Because you harbored an ancient hostility and delivered the Israelites over to the sword at the time of their calamity, the time their punishment reached a climax, therefore as surely as I live, declares the Sovereign Lord, I will give you over to bloodshed and it will pursue you…I will fill your mountains wit the slain; those killed by the sword will fall on your hills and in your valleys and in all your ravines…Because you have said, “These two nations and countries [Israel and Judah] will be ours and we will take possession of them,” even though I the Lord was there, therefore as surely as I live, declares the Sovereign Lord, I will treat you in accordance with the anger and jealously you showed in your hatred of them and I will make myself known among them when I judge you. Then you will know that I the Lord have heard all the contemptible things you have said against the mountains of Israel. You said, “They have been laid waste and have been given over to us to devour.” You boasted against me and spoke against me without restraint, and I heard it. This is what the Sovereign Lord says: While the whole earth rejoices, I will make you desolate. Because you rejoiced when the inheritance of the house of Israel became desolate, that is how I will treat you…Then all will know that I am Lord.”
The notations says, “Edom, a constant enemy, had to be dealt with before Israel could find peace.”
It is in the Word. Case closed. God does not change and his truth remains the same.
34 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:41 am
Redpepper: “Remember, lamb is very tasty, particularly with mint sauce …”
I love it! You know, even Christians misunderstand that the peace that Christ speaks about and the promise that God gives us of peace has nothing to do with peace between men on earth, but rather peace among men, which is Jesus Christ. There is no way that peace can be established without Christ. The lying down of the lion and the lamb is to come when God is through with the world as it is. Christ said that we would have “wars and rumors of wars” but not to be alarmed. It is fine to try to live a peaceful existence with our neighbor, but evil does exist and must be dealt with. It is ridiculous for Christians to demand that nonChristians behave as if they were.
35 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:42 am
OOps. Forgot to close that italics thingy.
36 JamesonLewis3rd // Jan 7, 2009 at 1:36 pm
Apparently, BHO does not consider his inauguration to be important except for those with cable.
Sickening.
37 RedPepper // Jan 7, 2009 at 2:06 pm
JL3 #36: Sickening, but understandable. Cable TV is still searching for someone to be the new O.J. Simpson …
38 everthink // Jan 7, 2009 at 5:28 pm
Will Ferrell Takes George Bush Impersonation To Broadway in “You’re Welcome America. A Final Night With George W Bush.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6CNgvPLJrc
12 days!
ET
39 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 5:45 pm
Neverthingsk: You asked for it. You got it! Obama!
The rest of us will just sit back and watch you grimmace as you find out what that means.
40 MajorDomo // Jan 7, 2009 at 5:52 pm
12 days to the Obammer ecollapse.
JL3: “Apparently, BHO does not consider his inauguration to be important except for those with cable.”
Hmmm. Amazing. Neither do I!
41 MajorDomo // Jan 7, 2009 at 5:56 pm
Somehow I have the feeling that the Obammer presidency is going to give us more red meat than the sleazebag administration! It’s already started!
42 everthink // Jan 7, 2009 at 7:37 pm
CNN Poll: Obama transition draws approval of 4 in 5 Americans
Eighty-two percent of those questioned in a new CNN/Opinion Research Corporation poll released Wednesday morning approve of the way the Obama is handling his presidential transition. That’s up 3 points from when we asked this question at the beginning of December. Fifteen percent of those surveyed disapprove of the way Obama’s handling his transition, down 3 points from our last poll.
The 82 percent approval is higher than then President-elect George W. Bush 8 years ago, who had a 65 percent transition approval rating, and Bill Clinton, at 67 percent in 1992.
ET
43 JamesonLewis3rd // Jan 7, 2009 at 7:39 pm
While it is true that the so-called “ME” (interesting acronym, don’t you think?) Situation has been going on for centuries, that is not a reason for the barbarism to continue.
It’s an Israeli Incursion into Gaza, not an invasion of Gaza, by the way. The news media are unaware of the difference.
~~~~~
As if things weren’t already looking gloomier by the nanosecond, Yellowstone is getting ready to blow us off the map.
“While the park has experienced earthquake swarms before, the recent activity is unusual because of its intensity.”
It’s been something like 640,000 years since it last exploded and it goes off every 600,000 years or so.
44 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 7:46 pm
Wonderful, James. Thanks for the encouraging news!
And Neverthingsk: A CNN poll? Are you kidding? Let’s see. A poll of CNN viewers – 60% liberals making up 90% Democrat. Yep, THAT’S a telling poll. That was a good one. Still laughing.
45 onlineanalyst // Jan 7, 2009 at 8:35 pm
Twelve more days? You are behind the curve, my friend. Iowahawk already has posted the 2009 year in review.
46 RedPepper // Jan 7, 2009 at 8:36 pm
JL3: The Yellowstone Supervolcano is definitely in the running, but we shouldn’t rule out the possibility of a Close Encounter with a NEO (Near Earth Object); and there are other, less likely, Doomsday candidates as well.
Including us humans …
47 baragirl // Jan 7, 2009 at 9:40 pm
I want everyone on here who was polled by CNN to raise their hand. Please?OHHH KAY, How about a big Amen?Anyone?
You mean no one even polled you ,Extraterresatrial? Well, that must have hurt.
48 Left Coast-Right Mind // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:13 pm
Twelve Days Before Inauguration, and Obama gave to me:
Twelve Clinton Retreads
Eleven Campaign Backpedals
Ten “Uhms” per Second
Nine Topless Photos
Eight Fingers Pointing
Seven Avoided Questions
Six Weak Denials
Five Biden Gaffes
Four Years of Marxism
Three Packs of Smokes
Two Tingly Legs
And a suspect birth record from Hawaii.
(The syllables don’t quite match up with the source material, so please do your best to bear with me.)
49 conserve-a-tip // Jan 7, 2009 at 10:57 pm
Left Coast Mind, that was supurb. Our dear departed friend, The Great Santini, I am sure is proud of your efforts. Applause. Applause.
50 mindknumbed kid // Jan 8, 2009 at 12:05 am
I agree. Very well done!
51 mindknumbed kid // Jan 8, 2009 at 12:07 am
Definitely worthy of a two-handed applause…
52 MajorDomo // Jan 8, 2009 at 12:26 am
4 out of 5 in a CNN poll? Yeah. they poll five of their “journalists”. One of them was spaced out when they polled, or it would have been 5 out of 5. Kinda like “4 out of 5 doctors recommend…”
53 baragirl // Jan 8, 2009 at 12:32 am
Left Coast-Right Mind, Just terrific and if you just practice a little you can work in all those syllables in the last line, just take a real deep breath first.
54 conserve-a-tip // Jan 8, 2009 at 10:19 am
Good morning all. I just read that The Reidster has declared that Norm Coleman will “never, ever serve”. I am now feeling quite confident about the prospect as he also said that the Senate would never, ever seat Burris and just look what they are doing!
55 Left Coast-Right Mind // Jan 8, 2009 at 12:21 pm
conserve-a-tip, mindknumbed kid and baragirl:
Thank you much for your positive reviews of my first foray into political/musical parody. If I practice practice practice, perhaps I’ll make it to Carnegie Hall.
conserve-a-tip:
Did Sen. Reid cross his arms, stamp his foot and let out a huffy breath after his comments about Coleman? That’s how you know he’s serious about who gets to play in his clubhouse. After all, he’s just desperately trying not to get outdone by Speaker Pelosi who’s basically telling Republican Representatives to not bother to show up to work at all.
56 MajorDomo // Jan 8, 2009 at 3:17 pm
11 days to the onset of the obammer ecollapse
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