Obama “can’t wait” to give the State of the Union address, and he won’t.
Learn how he developed “fair play, fair shot, fair share” slogan.
Which iconic, but bankrupt, American company will he takeover next?
Romney lashes out at Gingrich after Palmetto pounding, but which candidate might go third-party?
USS Lincoln enters Persian Gulf despite Iran’s warning, but what about the new Iranian threat?
News, fairly unbalanced. We report. You decipher. Please share with your news junkie friends.

Romney desperate after losing Iowa to Santorum, also slams Gingrich for propping up massive job killing scheme. Apple unveils new education tools, and NEA starts organizing. GM tops Toyota in sales, and Obama says unions need only one thing to keep American on top. Plus, images of monkey thought to be extinct. News fairly unbalanced. We report. You decipher. PJ News Break with Scott Ott. Fake, but true.

WikiPedia goes dark in protest. What will poor college students do?
Obama’s alternative to internet regulation — lookout below pirates!
Obama names Bainie as new OMB chief, sends Kerry to slam Romney.
Why Gov. Scott Walker must recalled, and…
How the White House and First Lady greeted Occupy Protesters.
All of this, with rich, simulated sincerity, in today’s PJ News Break with Scott Ott.

Did attacks on Romney backfire as part of secret conspiracy? Are you following Michelle Obama on Twitter? Will the Tebow-Brady matchup break ratings record? And what about the Taliban’s moral outrage over the Marine urination scandal? If you’re looking for serious answers…well…at least you’ll get a serious face. Today’s episode of my satirical newscast.

Here’s the last word on New Hampshire, and startling news about Fannie and Freddie. Ok…well…it’s actually just Scott Ott’s satirical newscast, PJ News Break: Fake, but true.

Today’s Top Satirical Stories: PJ News Break with Scott Ott
--GOP hopefuls attack Romney, Obama attacks self.
--Obama praises Unions for moving to back of ObamaCare line.
--Obama reacts to milk-laden cargo shipwreck off NZ.
--Olbermann to lead Current TV election coverage. Who?
--Tim Tebow wins in OT, prays to Jesus for forgiveness.
If you enjoy the stress-relieving power of PJ News Break, please share it with your friends.

--Unemployment down. New jobs up. Who done it?
--Obama’s leaner Pentagon leans on drones. See one with a new gun.
--Romney explains Santorum bounce, and why it doesn’t matter.
--Two airlines add fees to cover EU emissions tax, but did they really have to?
Scott Ott breaks today’s top stories. Is it real, or is it PJ News Break?